MS Mom

Second day in a row writing on the blog? Not sure I'm totally commited but I do know that this has always been a great outlet for me to get things in my brain going. I've been juggling too many things at once and this is that moment when I realise it and likely try to let some down slowly. I have limits. I have built in safe guards. My body no longer lets me abuse it. I have totally unrealistic expectations of myself and I think I'm going to have to work on accepting that once again. I can't be super-human not matter how hard I try. Next step trying to sort out how the heck to make things around my house work without my super-human attitude. I always get sucked back in thinking I 'need' to do things. My big kid is struggling in school and this is stressing me out. I am not sure at all what the best course of action is for helping him and the struggle is so darned stressful. I obviously want him to succeed and to feel good about himself. I feel like I'm de...

Okay so yesterday would have been my little brother's 28th birthday. He died a little over 3 years ago in a car accident. He was a really sweet man who had overcome a lot of adversity. I miss him and think of him often. I wonder about how to explain about him with Aidan. Today I cried for him and worried Aidan would be concerned but he just kept playing with me- just a little more gently than before- it felt like a very compassionate response to my grief. Anyways yesterday I hung out with my mom- without Aidan this is a fairly rare occurrence. And we got cracking on a project that I bought materials for 2 years ago- gulp. Anyways still love it and can't wait to get it finished and onto my couch!!!!    So we got to work sewing. Well I mostly talked while my mom sewed but she was okay with it lol. It felt so nice to have a creative outlet on a day where I really wasn't feeling too hot. I finally got my sewing machine parts in the mail so I hope to t...