A thoughtful place for me to come and share my struggles and accomplishments as a mom with multiple sclerosis. I am an optician and a weaver who loves music, dance and laughter! I have a bright and intense 6.5 year old son and an active and outgoing 3.5 year old so I am often trying to find a way to live the life I dream of, within my physical limitations.
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The dead zone. Not ready to give up my quiet time once again. how did this happen. I'm staying to late just so I can enjoy some peace and quiet but I'm to tired to really do anything. Ugg...I've decided this is when I should try to blog! Let's see if that works out lol.
Today was a great day. WE built a fort. Aidan loves hiding under a blanket but previously didn't get the concept of fort building. This, happily is no longer the case! I love being the mom of a toddler! So fun and silly.
Yep you heard me. I'm back and fighting. I'm in Seattle and ready for bed but first an update. I'm going in first thing in the morning for surgery. No calls with delays or anything so I'm hoping that means the green light is lit. I check in a 8am. I'm feeling nervous but lucky. We made it here with relative ease (though the nexus lane was looking mighty enticing while we waited 45min). I found a really sweet little Buddah charm that reminds me of my dad (who died a longish time ago) which left me with some warm fuzzy feelings. I spent a few hours hanging out with my mom at the mall and that was awesome! She is a super rad lady and I'm a lucky daughter. Now to snuggle with the man of my dreams. It's all good!
Tomorrow will bring whatever it brings and I will deal with it one moment at a time. Deep breaths. Goodnight interweb I'll update you when I'm back from surgery.
So I emailed my neurologist about all my new symptoms and the fact that I'm still struggling. First can we please take a moment to celebrate that she emails!! So freaking helpful! Anyways, I told her my symptoms and she thinks I'm having another relapse! Ugg she also said if it's just numbness than we won't try more steroids. It's more than numbness and I'm struggling (this is not something I say except when I'm really really struggling). Anyways, I tried to make that clearer on my reply email but she's going to try to see me at the UBC clinic on Monday. Fingers crossed that I can get an appointment and get some help. Now to obsessively think about why the hell I could be. having 2 relapses so close together and what the fuck in going to do if this is the beginning of my decline already! I've been counting on being healthyish until my late 40's at least so this could seriously throw a wrench into those plans! This is one of the hardest parts of …
It feels like such a long year! I still don't feel like myself. I'm feeling run down and haggard. I wish our situation was one where I could stay home and care for myself better. My eldest is struggling and it's an added burden that is maxing me out. I need to get back to taking care of myself physically but I don't know how I can possibly fit it into my schedual at present. I'm working hard to increase the type and quality of food made at home which is huge since I haven't been doing much since I started feeling MS-y. I keep hoping that I will just snap out of it but that doesn't seem to be happening. I'm not sure what my next steps are but I'm going to keep putting one foot in front of the other until I make it somewhere. Today I got out of bed and had a shower, go my kids fed, dressed and off to school. I've worked a full day of work and will soon be going home. Once home I will do a bunch more stuff like feed myself and get ready for tomorro…