MS Mom

I'm not sure what's going on but it's something. I don't feel like myself somehow? My head is spinning when I stand up once again so I'm fairly sure my veins have re-stenosed, I wish I had a way to confirm that but I haven't had any "head rushes" since my surgery. I'm fairly sure that's not the only thing going on though. I'm feeling emotionally off. So sensitive yo rejection and so easily hurt. I'm also feeling kind of "melancholy" for lack of a better explanation. I feel like I need a break but from what I'm not sure. I am sure the rain hasn't been helping and not having a car is slowing me down but I think all that is incidental I'm going to have to go talk to my doctor and maybe see a therapist? I've taken antidepressants but I've never followed up by talking and I'm thinking that might make the difference. On a different note I've been enjoying the yard at our new place and so has Aidan. I...

Apparently when I'm not having many symptoms my inspiration for blogging wains. Humm I can only imagine that this is because I write what's going on with me and when I'm not sick things seem to trivial to blog about. Not that nothing is going on its just that I'm not a professional and I don't have any experience I'm just figuring it out as I go. What do I believe as a parent? I know my son was born a humane being with thoughts and feelings and I believe in treating him like one. I don't talk down to him or assume he doesn't have feelings or opinions. I try to help him express himself and understand his feelings. I know my son has preferences so I try to respect those as I would like my own preferences respected. I believe my job as a parent often boils down to letting him experience the world the way he chooses and I'm along for the ride to make sure he doesn't die ( or get too injured). I say this casually because I let him do things othe...

I have not great points for this post so I'm planning in rambling so if you want a blog post that makes tins of sense please look elsewhere lol. My health: my chiropractor helped but my energy level stinks. I'm taking blood thinners to try to figure out if it's my veins shutting or if it's something unrelated. I'm praying that it's not a relapse because I really don't have much fight in me at the moment and I just can't face another MS relapse so soon. Thankfully no pain and few little mobility/ numbness issues so its more inconvenient and scary than anything. Parenting: I love my kid! He's seems so grown up since he's really started talking. We've got a talker and I can't express how much I love it. Even when it's inconvenient and frustrating (read often lol). It's another stage so it takes some practice figuring how to communicate effectively in this new medium. Aidan is busy counting everything that comes in pairs and ident...

Okay so I'm trying my hand at writing a little bit about what I've learned so far on my parenting journey: ~ I truly know that I don't know what I'm doing lol ~I follow no one 'style' of parenting except the one I constantly create and re-create ~I've done things, as a parent, I regret but none of them involve Aidan ~I believe infants are people and should be treated as such. From day one, they don't gradually develop consciousness outside the womb they do that inside the womb. ~ Kids are amazing little people and so fun to be around so take the time to find activities you can both enjoy ~Letting Aidan figure out toys, and items for himself instead of molding it for him is way more interesting to watch and gets easier with practice. ~This includes allowing him to take risks like climbing and jumping or other things where my first reaction is fear and all I want to say is 'no, stop, don't or worst of all let me show you how,'. Instead ...

Wild somehow over a month had passed without an update. Things have been really busy. We've been moving and that's taken a lot out of me. We are finished as of today and hand the keys over this weekend. I'm really happy it's all done and that now we can start working on settling into our new life. We've moving in with my in-laws. Totally new experience as I barely know them but eye opening and wonderful for Aidan who is finally getting to know his Granny and Grandpa. Aidan loves it here. More people to play with and talk to and so much space. He's been busy practicing stair climbing and door opening since we've never had stairs or this many doors. Having a yard is amazing and even just having the hose for him to play with has turned into a big deal. I found a free sandbox on Craigslist- bought a couple of bags of sand and Voila a ready made 2.5 year old's paradise! It really helps that laundry is right down stairs (and free as compared to the $2 a wash...

Where does the time go? I fell so far behind on so many things while I was sick I really have felt bogged down trying to get through it all. And of course it's all financially related (high stress for me!) like my darn extended health claims which they are giving me a hard time about. ugh. Anyways that's my compliant for the day. Hopefully I can get that stuff sorted relatively quickly. It also looks like we will be moving if we can get the details sorted. My darling husband is seriously considering going back to school. I'm so proud of him as it's not an easy decision to make when you are in your thirties with a child and a 'dependent' wife. I know it will be best for all of us in the long run but it will require some sacrifices which may include moving in with my mother and father in law. AS I say I think it will be worth it but it will be a change and the sacrifice to our privacy (and theirs) will surely take so getting used to. We just have to finish sorting...

Thinking aloud. I've read two articles recently talking about setting realistic expectations for moms. The basic idea is that blogs and pinterest and other online sources set up unrealistic ideals for moms and especially stay at home moms. I found this kind of saddening to hear. Don't get me wrong I idealize others more than I should but I'm usually about to ground myself and I know that no one is perfect no matter how they portray themselves to others. My experience has actually been that those who put the most effort into looking like they have their shit together tend to be the most messed up - not always but sometimes. I have gain so much insight, support and inspiration from Facebook, pinterest and blogs that I'm saddens to realize that I've been lucky and selective about what I read. I've finally been using some of the ideas I've seen on pinterest and other blogs and I've found a lot of freedom in having so many great activity ideas to choose from ...